A Hidden Burning Question

Ever feel like you have been stuck in a rut for a while? I kinda feel that way right now. I feel like this burning question is deep down in me, so deep that I don't even know what it is. I just find myself angry that it isn't answered and just wanting to scream it out. This question probably resembles "where am I going? what are You doing? Why is life changing so much? Why do I never feel like life hits "normal"? What do I do with the hurt left from people?" This question is sorta like all those questions rolled into one with a lot more involved. I find myself irritated easily and just not as excited about things like I normally am. God is good and encourages me through even the worst bad moods thankfully. I find myself irritated with people. Friendships are not something that last I've realized. Some last longer than others but it seems like in the end you won't be friends too long. That drives me crazy. There have been a few that I've had to walk away from but many that have walked away from me. It frustrates me to invest in a friend only to watch them give up. I look around my room and see pictures of tons of people in my life but when it comes down to it, only two or three are really good friends(that are my age). One of those lives a days drive away. I just want friends that are real and last. I want friends that will be honest and desire honesty. There is a song I keep coming back to by Britt Nicole about Love not always being safe but always being worth the risk. Here are the lyics

You keep tryin to get inside my head,
While I keep trying to lose the words you said
Can't you see i'm hangin by a thread,
To my life what I know, yeah i'm losing control and
Oh no, my walls are gonna break
So close, its more than I can take
I'm so tired of turning and running away
When love ju--st isn't safe
(your not safe, mmm-mm)

I'm strong enough, i've always told myself
I never want to need somebody else
But i've already fallen from that hill,
So i'm droppin that guard here's your chance at my heart and

Oh no, my walls are gonna break
So close, its more than I can take
I'm so tired of turning and running away
When love ju-st isn't

Everything you want, but its everything you need
Its not always happy endings but its hap-py in betweeen
Its taken so long, so long to finally see
The other isn't worth the risk

Oh no, my walls are gonna break
Oh no, my walls are gonna break
So close, its more than I can take
So tired of turning and running away
When love ju-st isn't safe

I guess my thoughts have really been "Ok God, what are doing in  my current friendships and am I ever gonna have more real friends? Why have I struggled more in talking to You lately?" Those are some questions I want answered, but mostly I want that inner question answered. 

Romans 8:26 (NKJ)
Likewise the Spirit also helps in our weaknesses. For we do not know what we should pray for as we ought, but the Spirit Himself makes intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered.

Well God, I don't know what to pray for, but I AM praying.